Emotional Regulation as Relational Infrastructure: A Living Systems Perspective on the Capacity to Be Alone and Collective Care

Highlights: Public health relevance—How does this work relate to a public health issue? The paper proposes a paradigm shift by redefining emotional regulation as a relational public good rather than an individual psychological skill. It examines how macro-level crises—including socio-economic inequality and the COVID-19 pandemic—destabilize the relational infrastructures essential for community well-being. Public health significance—Why is this work of significance to public health? It proposes a paradigm shift by conceptualizing emotional regulation not as an individual trait, but as a co-constructed relational capacity. The study highlights the “capacity to be alone” as a fundamental developmental milestone necessary for preventing social fragmentation and fostering collective resilience. Public health implications—What are the key implications or messages for practitioners, policymakers, and/or researchers in public health? Policymakers should prioritize investments in “affective infrastructure”, such as early childhood education and parenting support, to ensure long-term societal stability. Public health strategies should integrate social-emotional learning (SEL) across educational and professional systems to cultivate a more resilient and cooperative populace. In response to escalating global crises and widespread emotional distress, this paper advances a novel integrative framework that reconceptualizes emotional regulation as a relational public infrastructure essential for societal resilience. While traditional models treat emotional regulation as an individual psychological trait, we challenge this paradigm by repositioning it as a systemic capacity grounded in a psychodynamic living systems model. We argue that early caregiving experiences do not merely influence private development but form a foundational “affective infrastructure” that determines long-term social stability. Through this lens, the capacity to be alone is redefined from a solitary milestone to a relationally enabled skill that facilitates collective autonomy and prevents social polarization. We posit that when these relational fields are destabilized by inequality, the resulting dysregulation is a systemic failure rather than an individual deficit. The paper concludes by advocating for a normative shift in public health, treating emotional well-being as a public good cultivated through institutional systems of attunement. This perspective offers a timely and urgent vision for fostering inclusive, cooperative, and emotionally robust futures.